Is you could be on Facebook which would be shitter.
But what sometimes makes me feel a bit bitter,
Is that interesting things happen in real life too.
Twitter is lovely,
Twitter is nice,
Twitter is tasty like hot egg fried rice.
Twitter is crazy,
Twitter is fit,
But outside the door there’s some pretty cool shit.
A hashtag is nice but it can’t hold your hand,
A retweet is cool but what’s cooler is sand.
A favourite is flattering,
A mention is great,
But it won’t poach you eggs or wank-off your mate.
Yes it is fun to see what is trending,
But riding a horse may be time more worth spending.
Yes, it is nice to do some top tweeting,
But would it be nicer to do Ronan Keating?
“WTF” may sound good but it’s no KFC,
“OMG” makes you smile but fuck, it’s not brie.
Follow-Friday is cool but I’ll tell you what’s better,
A tree or a hedge or a big chunk of feta.
So next time that tweeting leaves you a bit hollow,
Sack off the hashtags and give LIFE a follow.
Or write a shit poem about Twitter.